Save Marriage Stop Divorce 

Divorce is one of the most heart breaking and terrifying situations to face. You have made a life with someone and to divorce is to tear that life apart. You may be in a place where you feel as if you’ve tried everything and are at a standstill. It may seem hopeless but it’s not. There are things you may not have tried that can save your marriage. 

Usually, in a divorce situation, it is one-sided. Divorce is rarely a mutual decision. One wants out and the other is desperate to keep them there. The spouse trying to save the marriage is usually panicky and desperately trying to keep the other from leaving. This is understandable, but sometimes can bring out the worst in us. 

It is part of the human condition to want to hold on tighter to something you don’t want to lose. Many spouses are guilty of being too needy. For example, professing your love ten times a day. You cannot do this in a situation where you’ve been told your spouse doesn’t love you anymore. You’re not listening or validating what your spouse is saying. They don’t feel the same way right now and you have to respect those feelings. Loosen the reins. Quit trying so hard. Let it go for awhile and give them the space they need. 

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Another reason couples can’t seem to reconcile is because they have been trying to change one another. This is never going to work. You cannot fit a square peg into a round hole no matter how hard you try and you cannot change who you are for anyone. It may seem like its working for a short period of time but eventually you or your spouse will revert back to who you really are. If you truly want to save your marriage, you will accept each other “as is.” 

Instead of fighting those differences between you, try and do things their way for awhile. Your spouse will probably appreciate your effort and be more inclined to meet you in the middle. Approaching your spouse with a positive attitude and respect will instill a mutual respect for you. Are you more inclined to listen to someone who is aggressive and yelling in your face or someone who is willing to see things your way and who treats you with respect? It’s much easier to admit your faults and want to work on them when someone is supportive versus combative. 

Taking these steps is not a simple task. There has been a buildup of anger, hurt, mistrust, and disrespect. You have to let go of negative habits and bad feelings in order to move onto a better place. Don’t expect things to get better over night or in the near future. It took a long time to get you where you are and it’s going to take a long time to undo it. If you are willing to do what it takes, however, you may find a love with each other you never thought possible. It may save your marriage.